EyeBlack has to have the most brilliant corporate team I have ever seen in my life.

First of all, they sell a product that is essentially black tape you put under your eyes, which supposedly catches the sun to keep the sun out of your eyes. Hah! Come on now. If you believe this, you probably also believed that Rick Ankiel naturally came back to the big leagues with no supplemental help.

Second of all, according to CNBC, this company is now contemplating deals with the NFL to sell advertising space on the black strips on players’ faces. They’re already making them with college and high school team logos, which I’m down with, but now we’re going to see Taco Bell’s new cheesy burrito on faces?

I have to draw the line here. This is a bad idea for the sports, and an even worse idea for corporate sponsors. Picture this:

You’re watching the Tennessee Titans play the Cleveland Browns on a Sunday afternoon. The players come out, and on this day we’re blessed with little slices of pepperoni pizza under all the players’ eyes, sponsored by Pizza Hut. Halfway through the third quarter, someone looks at Albert Haynesworth wrong, and Albie proceeds to stomp on the guy’s face repeatedly for 8 seconds. The guy is heading off the field with the support of teammates, with his eyeball has exploded all over his face, making the pizza slice look like fresh ground beef.

Never…eating…Pizza Hut…again.