As a kid, I loved beauty pageants. I’m speaking of days before the Internet, when porn wasn’t easily available, and you had to have vivid imaginations so you could remember all hotties when you spanked it two hours later in your bedroom. Oh, that was just me? Well, then, anyways, for the second year in a row, Miss USA fell down at the Miss Universe competition, and for the second year in a row, I missed it. Damn.
